Joe Jones

I like author Anne Lamott. A lot. Sometimes I dream that she arrives on my doorstep with her dreadlocks, best-friend-the-priest, and a book of poems by Rumi and announces that she is my long lost Aunt who has come to drink coffee and talk about life until the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes, in my dreams, we listen to Dawes together and smoke on the porch. Sometimes we go to church together and bake the blackberry cobbler of my youth.
Suffice to say, I follow her on twitter and buy her novels when I see them because I want her to feel loved so she keeps on writing.
This was the case with Joe Jones, which I dutifully read, cover to cover.
Even though I really only like her nonfiction.
Even though the first few pages of dialogue were so confusing that I finally had to stop trying to figure out who was saying what because I knew if I didn't I'd have some kind of mind-melt-down.

Hector and the Search for Happiness

Hector and the Search for Happiness is a pretty big title for such a little book. In another writers hands, the subject could be grossly over-written. (Is this a thing? Over-written? I'm going for a book equivalent to over-acted...ridiculously tiresome. I'd love to hear your thoughts.)

In general, I liked it. The writing style was an interesting change from what I normally read - childlike, but not childish. "It was Sunday, but Edouard was at the office because he had to finish a piece of work for the following day. He was going to show a very important man how to carry out a merger, and he wanted to do this ahead of another Edouard from another bank who wanted to show the same very important man how to do the same thing. And this very important man in turn wanted to carry out the merger ahead of another very important many who wanted to do the same thing. Hector had understood that in business everything was always a bit of a race whereas in psychiatry it wasn't really like that, you just had to be careful not to let your patients talk too much, otherwise you'd be late for the next ones, and they wouldn't like it." [page 41]

Also I like lists, and in Hector's quest, as he goes along he simply lists the 23 lessons in happiness he learns. It makes them easy to remember, and I suppose, to put them into practice.

What I don't like, is being reminded that for many men (although in this case it might just be a cultural difference since author Francois Lelord is from France and practices psychiatry there) infidelity is not a big deal, and as long as it doesn't make you feel TOO bad, you should just keep your indiscretions discreet and you can have your cake and it too.

The History of Love

If I were to make a list of all the qualities that make a book truly great, the most important would be that the text were able to MOVE ME. To tears. Of grief or joy or confusion, it doesn't matter. What matters is that the words and sentences strung together at some point become so personal that I can't not be altered for them.

Kiss & Tell

A sweet little book I read on St. Valentine's Day.

Compiled by Macy's to benefit the Go Red for Women campaign and designed by Werner Design Werks of Minnesota, Kiss & Tell is a coffee table book of sorts where famous faces and fashion designers reminisce about their most memorable kisses in between musings from the editors on the most romantic places to kiss or be kissed. Tres' Romantic as Kimberly Wilson would say.

Much of what you expect can be found in the thick, damask-illustrated pages - Nicky Hilton having been kissed for the first time by some slobbery high schooler, Kimora Lee Simmons sweet memory of kissing her baby daughter for the first time, and the oh-so-articulate Tara Reid with "A kiss is just a kiss, unless it's not just a kiss." One of the most thought-provoking pieces was by CSI actress Marg Helgenberger on Page 10 about a time she found herself in an elevator with the cute young actor Joshua Jackson who spent those few moments between floors telling her about HIS most memorable kiss - his first one actually - that had not only been on screen but with her! She couldn't even remember it, but it made me think about my own past liplocks and whether I might actually be someone else's most memorable kiss?

I loved that accompanying each vignette was a lipstick-print from each writer. Its amazing how some lips just look like they should belong to certain people - Monique Lhuillier - of course her lips look French - how could they not?

While I won't kiss and tell about THIS Valentine's Day, I will put out there a short list of places where I have stolen a memorable kiss, (or hope to one day!), checked off from the extensive list in the back of the book...

• In the dark...
• At the movies...
• On New Year's Eve...
• In a car...
• In a car wash...
• On a ski lift...
• Under mistletoe...
• In a hammock...
• In the woods...
• At the alter...

What about you?

The Cowgirl's Guide to Love

What can I say? It was a short book with big type and lots of bulleted lists.

The Cowgirl's Guide to Love by Ellen "Lil" Patrick is your basic "Only the best man deserves fabulous you - BUT - make sure to have hobbies, know how to cook, pretend until you actually like sports and don't dress like one of those harlot saloon girls." Each bit of advice on how to recognize, then snag, then be with the aforementioned "Best Man" is peppered with piles of references to John Wayne, Calamity Jane, Annie Oakley, horses, ridin', shootin' and yer darn tootin' the West was won by women!

What the Wild West can teach us about love and relationships is an interesting concept I think, and handled delicately could make for beautiful commentary. (Actually, for a perfect example of this, I highly recommend Peace Like a River - one of the most intensely touching stories I have ever read; it is a truly a love lesson in so many ways, set in the Dakota badlands and with a storyline tied literally and figuratively to such legends as Butch Cassidy and Wyatt Earp.)

This Cowgirl's Guide however is choppy - the ideas are bounced around and off of each other at what seems like breakneck speed, just barely hitting upon a piece of what might actually be good advice to the single lady before racing off to some other comment on dealing with the mama-dependent or mama-deprived man in your life, leaving no opportunity for concept development.

While the feminist in me rages against idea that all men can be categorized this way, I have found myself silently but inadvertently judging every man I meet and imagining I know what his mama was like. The author encourages readers to first know which kind they prefer, and provides tips for the training of each. Here are some gems:
Page 58:

"How to Manage Mama-Dependent John Wayne...

• If you often have delicious homemade snacks on hand, so much the better...
• If he leaves items of clothing at your house... return them promptly, washed and pressed...
• When you are at his place, always clean up tidily after yourself, and leave the place a little cleaner overall than when you arrived... "
  

How to Manage Mama-Deprived John Wayne...

• If he is mama-deprived, he will be alarmed by too much domesticity...you can comfortably follow your instinct to not vacuum the house or bake a pie before he comes over...
  
• Don't feel you have to call him. You don't...
• Avoid independently contacting members of his family..."

Intuitively, women know how to behave around guys we like - so books of this nature should be unnecessary, unpopular and unpublishable right? Well, sometimes it's nice to be reminded that all relationships have elements of game playing and that to win at love there are rules to follow, some to bend, and sometimes break. Like that whole not dressing like a saloon girl thing - dammit those old gals were hot - and classier than half the dames I saw in Scottsdale last night!